The Waiting Bar
by Invigilator
Summary: Recurring nightmares bring Bella to Edward's bar, where she discovers dark, disturbing secrets regarding this handsome bar owner, and a past they share together. Characters are the same, but plot and background have nothing to do with the books. One-shot


Waiting Bar

Disclaimers: I realized I should add this. Well the characters are from Twilight, that I can't take away unfortunately :(

But everything else in the story is my own creation, thank you very much.

***

Edward was waiting in the Waiting Bar.

The Waiting Bar was a middle sized bar located just outside New York City. That city was, people loved to refer to as; No Man's Land. The tiny city of Thurus was hardly seen, even on the biggest map. Driving along Highway 45, one could easily pass the arrow pointing inward the curve: Thurus, population: 5000

But Edward was waiting in his bar, which often, even on a prosperous day, had no more than ten customers.

These customers came for the same reason, Edward's famous cocktail; Await. The blond girl Jenny used to pester him, "Why name it Await? And…why name this place the Waiting Bar?"

Edward was silent. He merely sat quietly, his eyes sharp, looking intent at the main door.

As time passed, customers could guess the reason behind these names. It was easy to guess, since Edward was there every night, no matter snow or rain.

He was waiting.

At night, Edward took a seat in the corner couch, drank his wine and tapped his fingers slightly on the table. Women came and went; still Edward paid no attention. His icy blue eyes were fixed only in one direction, sometimes without their bright twinkles.

The main door was pushed open.

It was the only bar in Thurus, night hangers loved to fool around and drink to challenge their limits. People wandered in and out, sometimes not paying the bill. The main door's opening, with its tiny creak, was really the least noticeable event.

But Edward gave a slight, insignificant tremor. He let out a deep breath that seemed to rid his lungs of air, and closed his eyes.

Then he opened them, and heard his heart thumping. It was deafening.

Edward could hear no more sounds coming from the surrounding. It was only his heart, its beating, and her heels clicking on the marble ground.

A shadow from the candlelight, then it was more than a shadow, now an image, and a moving image.

The coming woman was average looking. She had dark brown wavy hair, ocean blue eyes, and a chubby cheek.

She looked exhausted.

She sat on the high chair beside the counter, her back facing Edward. They were near, so near Edward could smell the sweet scent of her blood. He had tasted it, a long time ago. It tasted like honey. Very addictive.

Edward remained seated in his place. He pondered if he should walk up to her, pat her head, smooth her hair, like he used to do.

He could say, "Hey, you're finally here." And hug her.

He could twirl a strand of her brown curls and say, "You haven't changed one bit."

He wanted to kiss her cheek, watch her blush, and smile, "I missed you."

But Edward did not do any of the above. He simply stayed where he was; watching her, gazing her like there was no tomorrow. Maybe there wasn't.

Edward felt his eyes burning from his intense concentration to look at her. He was not surprised to realize that he welcomed the burning sensation. It meant she was once again, back into his world.

Edward had been waiting two hundred years. It was the shortest, compared to all the other times. He had not known before, that reincarnations were inter-connected. No matter the number of times she reincarnated from her past lives, it was the same eyes.

Same facial features, same body structure, same voice, even. Edward used to think it was a coincidence. Now he was certain it was not.

It was Bella's determination, to still look identical, so he could always find her, in amidst of people that blocked their way.

Edward grinned involuntarily. It was a blinding smile. For a moment everyone but one turned and watched him, dazed. They had never seen such a bright, handsome smile.

Bella did not turn.

***

Bella was queasy with anger. It was, unsurprisingly, because of the dream.

She dreamt of a wide wheat field, so vivid she could smell the fragrance of wheat, and feel the moving air brushing against her hair. She was laughing, never so happy, and chasing someone. It was, from the back view, a man not much older than her. He was tall with broad shoulders and long, athletic legs. He was wearing a long brown robe that reminded Bella of the Middle Ages. Bella looked down at herself; she was wearing the same brown robe.

"I'll catch you this time!" She yelled excitedly at him, knowing that he would stop and wait for her.

Like she expected, the man stopped and Bella could hear a brief sigh. It was a sigh of dottiness and love. _He must love me. _She thought, and her cheeks turned a radiant red. _I think I love him. _

Bella ran and jumped onto his back, kissing his neck. The man groaned and muttered her name. He turned and drowned Bella with breathtaking kisses. Bella tried to keep her eyes open. She wanted to see him, to trace her fingers along his face and memorize every single detail.

But when she forced her eyes open, Bella woke up. Then faintly, she could hear screams, cries and the laughter of mania. She could hear her village's destruction under the wicked laughter. It was the laugh of devil. She knew she ran, turning as she ran. She could hear him, shouting as he was dragged into doom; his voice was a curse into her dreams.

"Run! Bella! Run and don't look back!"

Then her dream would end completely, and her world twisted back into reality, leaving her sweating and twitching. Bella hated her dreams. It broke her heart.

Ever since her childhood, she had dreams of herself in the brown robe. Sometimes she was in the wheat field. Other times, the man and her were grazing sheep on the hill, or playing water in the only pond. They were happy in all those places. Bella loved to kiss his neck, where she knew he was extra sensitive.

But the ending had the same setting. Blood, sweat, stench, fear, desperation, and his booming voice, "Run! And don't look back!" Bella had no idea if she did.

Bella thought she was breaking down from the torments of these dreams. Everywhere she went she could see parts of the dream floating into her vision, wobbling her legs. It was destroying her, changing her into a stranger, and meddling with her life.

Bella drank, taking fast and big gulps, of the famous wine of Await. It was a blend of vodka and orange juice. The body was a glowing green, but a layer of bright yellow afloat.

Bella continued drinking and soon emptied a glass. She waved the waiter for another glass, and glanced around. She was aware of her stiff back, which meant someone had been looking at her. For a long time.

Bella's vision swept past the couple making out and landed on a pair of icy oceans. Those eyes, Bella thought, were the most charming eyes she had ever seen.

Oddly, they were familiar.

Thus Bella summoned up her soprano skills and bellowed at him, "Why are you looking at me that way? Do we know each other?"

***

Edward gave an inward chuckle at her question. It was just like before, her expression of curiosity and caution. Even her flickering eyes betrayed her mock courage, showing its hidden worry.

He walked over and sat beside her, but offered no answer. Instead Edward blended himself a glass of Await and drank silently.

Bella watched as this familiar and handsome man drank in silence, a smile by his lips, having no intention to answer her. Bella realized hatefully that she was ignored by him. She turned and shifted a seat to the left, taking a glass of Await from the waiter's tray. Bella lifted the glass into the air and bellowed again happily, "To my long night!" As she brought her arms down to drink, however, a strong hand grabbed her wrist.

Bella spun her head, and met his eyes. In the dim candlelight, their gazes converged and Bella suddenly felt faint. It was a very familiar grab, as if he had done that countless times, in the vague past. His fingers were long and powerful. The man had pale skin, but his grasp was filled with strength; Bella could see a bruise forming on her wrist. She did not feel pain.

Oozing in her was the peaceful happiness in dreams. The pure content she had when running in the wheat field. Bella looked very closely at the man. He had a bemused expression, a mixture of resign and joy. Then he spoke.

"You can't drink too much, you get knocked out easily." His voice was deep and smooth, tainted with a tinge of maturity and wisdom. Bella had never heard such a voice from anyone, but she was certain she had heard it from _someone._

How did you know that? Bella started to ask, but bit back the question. Instinctively she felt she should have known the answer already. It was a silly subject to bring up. Bella hesitated.

"Who are you?" Eventually she broke the silence with an inquiry of who he was.

Edward released her wrist. There was already a slight red mark which would soon develop into a bruise. He shifted over beside her.

"I'm Edward, I own this bar."

"Edward?" Bella did a mental search on the name, she was certain she knew no Edward, but felt she should at least make sure. Then a pang of sharp pain hit her head, and Bella stopped her thinking. She did not know him.

"Nice name." She smiled at him, and put aside her glass of Await. Edward pushed a glass of pure water at her.

"This is what you should drink after alcohol." He teased her playfully. Bella was struck again, by the sense of familiarity.

Maybe she ought to return, just for the sake of it.

***

Bella slept well that day. She had not dreamt, which the first of many nights. The next night, she returned to the Waiting Bar, driving faster than she was conscious of. She saw Edward sitting on the same couch, his fingers relaxed, tapping on the nearby tea table. It seemed like, Bella thought, a classic position of waiting.

_Was he waiting for her?_

Bella sat down beside him, intended to ask. Before she lifted her lips, Edward pushed a glass of Await towards her. Bella stared at him in surprise.

"I thought you didn't like it when I drink." She said, holding up the glass.

Edward laughed this time; Bella could see his white sparkling teeth. _Fine teeth he has, _she thought.

"Just one glass." Edward winked at her.

And it proved that one glass was enough. Bella opened herself up to this stranger much quicker than she expected. She began to tell him about her dreams.

Her many, haunting dreams. She described each of them with all the details she could summon; it was like telling different stories. Time quickly passed, but neither of them was aware.

Bella had been badly disturbed by the dreams, but she never told anyone. She hadn't thought about sharing such intimate, private scenes with, hell, her best friend.

And here she was, telling Edward everything. She wanted, she knew, to tell him all that she could. She just had no idea why.

Bella ended her stories with a question.

"Do you think I turned around?" She giggled. Her face was a dark blush from the soft crystal lights that night.

Edward's gaze was fixed at Bella; he appeared to be deep in his own thoughts.

He wanted to hold her face and say, "You did Bella, Goddamn it, you did." He opened his mouth to tell her, but it changed into something else completely.

"It's only a dream. It's going to go away once you let it out, try not to think about it."

It was sheer words of consolation to digress from the topic, but Bella's face lit up into genuine, implacable delight. For a second, she looked like a lost child finding home after nights in the wilderness.

She held onto his elbow, her dark blue eyes full of trust.

"You think so? You're certain it would go away? Have you tried it?"

Edward's heart went out to her. She must have suffered roughly from the dreams, to grab onto such a slim light of hope.

Edward gave no reply, but it didn't matter for Bella. She knew she believed him.

And hence her dreams were gone.

***

In a month, Waiting Bar was Bella's second home. She would arrive, punctually at eight thirty every night. Sometimes she came in a torrential rain, looking a wet mess. Edward never stopped her, he merely walked up and handed her new, dry towels.

Bella didn't drink much.

Edward seldom let her. He invented new beverages, mixed her favorite fruits to produce weird taste juices. But Bella loved Edward's inventions. She gulped glasses, much to Edward's pleasant surprise. Bella loved to chat, about her childhood, relationship, and work.

Edward hired waiters to mind the bar business, sat quietly with Bella and patiently listened to her, night by night.

_She never changes_. Edward remarked again. The past Bellas, the Bella now, they shared the same dream. They were bright, cheerful young ladies with great expectations of their future.

"Do you know what an equinox is?" She asked, trying his new caramel sundae.

Edward nodded, smiling encouragingly at her. Bella have him a tiny hug that sent Edward's heart into gallops.

"Well," There was pride in her tone. "I'm starting a design company, it's called Equinox. I do interior designing for business institutions." She browsed around Waiting Bar. "You could let me design a new look for your bar." She offered, paused, and then added.

"For free." Bella smiled with her dimples big and gleaming.

Edward nodded, still watching her. Bella blushed and looked down. She could see, clearly, cherish in his eyes.

_Maybe he likes me_

Bella was filled with happiness. It would be best that way, because Bella thought she was falling in love with Edward.

***

Winter faded away as spring crept silently into the world. Edward picked up the bouquet of lavenders. He was certain Bella would love it. He could imagine her smelling the flowers, her eyes closed with bliss.

Edward beamed with the picture planted in his head. He couldn't wait for night to arrive.

But the clock struck nine, and Bella was nowhere seen. It was the first, of many months, that Bella missed a night in Waiting Bar.

Blocks of anxiety built up in Edward. He watched as the last customer of Waiting Bar left, her slim figure disappearing around the corner. Edward looked at the time. It was twelve thirty.

Edward waited. That was his only option. It was the only thing he could do.

When the clock beeped one, Edward raised his head, his eyes shifting at the door. He could sense her presence, she was coming.

Bella strolled, with slow strides into Waiting Bar, and faced Edward. There was an aggrieved, hurt expression on her face. Edward was shocked to see she was in tears. Bella was almost beside him when she tripped and fell.

Edward, in a blink, dashed and enveloped her into his warm, protective hug. He frowned as he smelt full strength vodka.

"Bella?" Edward carried her to the couch and laid her down. Bella was still sobbing quietly, her eyes closed tight. There were shiny tears on her lashes.

"Why? Why…" She murmured with weakness in her voice. Bella pushed her eyes wide open and looked directly at Edward. "I dreamt again." She declared.

Edward lowered his head. He liked to lower his head before listening. Bella cupped his masculine face with her small hands and glared, with bright tears, at him.

"This time, Edward, I dreamt of the end." Her tone broke.

Edward's heart started pounding painfully. Images brushed across his mind, but Edward was speechless. He sat, calmly, and held Bella's hand. Her hands were cold from the wind. Edward massaged them gently. It had already grown into a habit.

Bella gazed silently at Edward for a long time and raised the corner of her lips into an ironic smile.

"I dreamt, Edward, of a man and I. We grew up from the same village and did everything together. We played on the wheat field, grazed the animals, swam in the water, and counted stars. We had our first kiss on the oldest tree outside the village; we had our first night on the hay bed in his house, when I turned eighteen."

Bella's smile grew bigger. "I loved him, and I know he loved me. The funny thing was, none of us even considered about the future. All we thought then was kisses and hugs and all the time we could spend, in our isolated village."

Her frail smile crumbled like a flaccid building.

"Then it had to invade our village. Its long pointed teeth were dripping of blood and roars like tolls of death. None of our weapons could weaken it. All we did then, him and I, we hid and watch. We watched it tearing our parents apart, gnawing at their flesh. We watched it burning down our houses, laughing menacingly as it killed. It was killing everyone we knew, and we watched. That was all we did."

Slowly, Edward closed his eyes. Vibrant pictures pinned into his mind and for a moment, amongst his urge to tear up, he was reliving the worst nightmare.

Bella kissed his eyelids softly, her hands wrapped behind his neck.

"We were discovered," She whispered into his ear. "We hid as quietly as possible, but we were discovered by the monster. It caught me by my arm, and was dragging, no; forcing me with such strong grip…I knew I couldn't escape. But he shouted at me, with desperation and hopelessness I have never known."

Bella's gaze was now distant, looking into a faint past.

"He yelled 'Run! Bella! Run and don't look back!'"

She buried her face into Edward's chest.

"But I didn't want to run. I did as he said, but I didn't want to run. I didn't want to leave him behind…with that monstrous creature. So…I looked back."

Bella clutched onto Edward with such tightness, she could not breathe without taking deep, hoarse breaths. When she spoke again, her voice was laden with sobs.

"I looked back and…it happened so fast. His blade was piercing through the air, and then it struck my heart. I didn't feel any pain. In the split second, I died." Bella muttered, lifting her head to kiss Edward. "He killed me, Edward, with the blade I gave him." Bella was trembling.

Then she started laughing, with hot tears dribbling down her eyes. Her laughter, like thunder, shattered the air in the bar.

Edward embraced Bella, grasping her at his chest and smothered her with kisses.

"Do you blame him?" He asked, his mouth catching hers. Bella felt a strong agony gripping her heart.

She kissed back and rapidly shook her head.

"No, God no." She fixed her teary eyes on him. "It just broke me; hurt me, to see that monster took him away. The blade, it slicing through my heart, was nothing compared to what that monster did to him. And I had to watch, I had to watch! I was dying, and he was being thrown onto the ground. Then the devil, it clutched his throat and sank its teeth into him...At that moment, there was a giant flash of lightning, Edward, and I tried to open my tired eyes. I wanted to see him, to see him, if not one time." Bella wiped her flowing tears.

"In my dreams…he was always a blurry image, I could never see him the way I see you."

Bella shook her head feebly.

"I woke up." She said flatly. Bella rested her battering head on Edward's shoulder. Her sobs quieted into tiny sniffles.

"I woke up before I could see him. And all that's left in me, Edward, is this non-stopping heartache. Edward, I think I'm going to die of this heartbreak. I miss him, I really do."

She reared her lips into a fragile, teary smile.

"I must be crazy, aren't I? To feel such a deep strong affection for a vague shadow in my dreams…I must be going crazy."

Bella drifted gradually into a deep sleep.

***

Edward was blending a new drink. His movements were slow and elegant, like an arched, poisonous snake before its attack.

The new drink was red. Maroon at the bottom of the wine glass, then red, pink and gradually it lightens to a shade of transparency. Edward raised the glass and look through it. He was looking at the world through a thick layer of redness. It was the color of blood.

Edward put down the glass and heaved a long sigh. Bella had not been to the Waiting Bar for seven days. He picked up his cell, dialed her number but cancelled the call. Edward had a heavy, leaden and dreadful sentiment he couldn't explain.

Outside, the night wind was howling, like a mournful mother without her child. Soon it was midnight, the wind was blowing with more power, shattering a window and bending the willow planted just beside the bar's main door. It was a dry, windy hour.

The growl of thunder joined in, crumbling the night sky, with flashes of blinding lightning.

It was almost like that fateful night, thousand years ago.

Edward sat peacefully in the coming storm. Sparks of lightning illuminated his face, before bestowing darkness. His pale face plummeted into a pattern of lighting up then dimming down. It sent a streak of spookiness.

A gush of wind blew the main door apart; her silhouette crept in, faster than usual.

"I was waiting." Edward said simply, and lighted the smallest candles on the counter. In the faint glow, Bella was shaking where she stood.

Her wavy hair was wet against her cheeks. Edward noted she looked, once again, like a lost child.

Bella's eyes were fixed dazedly on Edward's astute features. For a long time she was quiet. Edward didn't mind her silence and gestured at his drink.

"Give it a try, it's my new blend." He pushed the glass of red, glowing liquid towards her, almost in a slow motion.

Another lightning struck, the red wine seemed to blaze in dim candlelight.

Bella lifted the glass to her nose and took a deep breath. She opened her eyes and grinned.

"It smells familiar; I bet there's lavender."

Edward felt his heart closing in, his back was rigidly motionless.

Bella was still grinning.

"You think you can use the same trick on me don't you? You're always so calm and composed, Edward, and sometimes I hate it. But at other times, I admire this trait. It's one of the reasons I fell in love with you."

Edward sighed and rubbed his temples.

"You regained your memories."

"Yes, I suppose I did." Bella shrugged and sat beside him. She glanced at the glass of red wine, but did not attempt a drink.

"You're the man in my dreams, aren't you?" Bella said. It wasn't a question, but a statement.

"We grew up together, fell in love and shared the deepest secrets. We chased in the wheat field and grazed sheep. You taught me to swim, advised me ways to battle my so called insomnia. You knew it wasn't insomnia; it was the thinking of you that kept me from slumber land. Still you told me to count stars. I should add, it never worked."

Edward coughed in slight embarrassment while Bella patted his shoulders understandingly.

"We spent many happy years, promising our marriage to each other. I thought my life would go with our plan. We would marry, have kids, love them and watch them grow up. I thought such perfect endings."

Bella sighed.

"But we could never battle what was set in stones, can we?"

Silence stealthily creped between them. The knowledge of what followed was something too painful to put into words.

Edward clenched his fists.

***

"Why is it that, God had to take away our happiness and replace it with such misery?"

Bella shattered the stillness. She tried to smile without much success.

"I did research on the monster, and it was…" She looked up at Edward forcefully. "It was a vampire."

Her tone was smooth and flat. But word by word, with the crumbling of thunder and flashing of lightning, it stabbed into Edward's throttling mind. He was thunderstruck.

Bella raised her voice.

"You killed me in time, before it could bite me. But you had no time for suicide. If I'm not mistaken, Edward, you are a vampire, aren't you?"

Edward, bit by bit, pushed his lids shut.

"Answer me!" Bella stood up in anger and grabbed Edward by his shoulders. "Tell me you're not, Edward, tell me you aren't!" Hope lingered in her tone. Bella laughed pathetically and sank back into her chair.

"But you can't deny what you are." Bella stared into the candlelight. "You stopped me from becoming a vampire. But you couldn't save yourself. You lived isolated and alone for a thousand years without me…Do you think I'll forgive you?" Her eyes were wide open. Bella advanced on Edward suddenly, pushing himself against the chair.

"I won't! I'll never forgive you for deserting me! Edward, I am not ONE BIT grateful of you. I don't appreciate your heroism! I hate it when you sacrifice yourself for me, you know I HATE IT!" Bella collapsed into Edward's arms and sobbed.

With trembling hands she held the glass of wine and shook it at Edward's face.

"This, this 'new invention'," She leered, "It's known as Forget, isn't it?" Bella threw the glass with big might. It shattered just like a great flash of lightning burst into the night.

"This isn't the first time you've seen me these thousand years. You saw each of my new life; you waited for me through my reincarnations. But in every single one of them, when my memories resurface, you make me drink this."

Edward did no self defense. He merely kept his mouth shut and gritted his teeth. Bella smiled yet again. It was a smile without warmth.

"Remember the wheat field, Edward? You used to kiss me there and put your hand on my heart. You promised to stay with me forever. By forever, you meant that?" Bella pointed at the broken glass pieces and blood red liquid.

"Why force me to forget you? Edward, why?" Bella was suffocating in intense anger. She waited for Edward's response but he looked at her without a word. It was a sad, sorry expression without remorse. Bella was overcome with furiousness and before she knew it, she had a piece of sharp broken glass placed before her neck.

"I will not," Bella emphasized each word. "Drink any of the wine tonight. Edward, I refuse to forget you again." She lifted her lips bleakly. "I've been asking myself over and over. If I should die now, Edward, would you bite me?" Her words were slow and deliberate.

"If I should die, would you bite me, Edward? Let's have a try, shall we?"

Time froze. Bella felt a gush of chilliness engulfing her. Edward was slowly standing up.

Another flare of lightning!

Bella muffled a scream. Edward was transforming. A pair of sharp, long fangs were extending from his mouth. His eyes changed color into a dark shade of grey, his irises was gone. The glassy, vacant gray eyes were fixed at Bella as Edward paced towards her.

Bella stepped back in unnamed fear.

Edward laughed. It was an unkind, sarcastic sound with a tiny hint of despair.

"Bella, are you scared? What're you so scared of? Me?" He was right before her now, looking down at her quivering lips.

"There's far more than my face, Bella. Look at this," He murmured softly and took out a plastic bag of blood. "This is my food; animal blood that has long expired. Do you have any idea, Bella, how it feels to drink sour blood every meal in your life?" He put the blood back and faced Bella again.

"How would you like it if you could never go into strong sunlight, never settle down because of eternal youth, never make attachments with anyone?" Edward gently cupped Bella's sobbing face into his hands and leaned down at her ears.

"No, honey, this is not the end." His voice gave a tiny break. "There is no end." Edward grasped Bella's shoulders and glared at her.

"I can't even end this pain, because vampires never die. Do you want to try? Do you really want to give it a try?"

He shook and forced her to look up at him. Her face was deadly white.

Edward felt his heart smashing.

"Bella my love, do you still want to become a vampire? Tell me and I'll bite you." He massaged her neck.

"But if you don't," he pushed her back. "Get out of here and don't return."

Bella fell onto the marble ground, in a stunned shock. She was shaking like a ship in sea storm. Then she gave a tiny scream and staggered out of Edward's vision, disappearing into the night.

Edward heard the 'bang' of main door closing.

He felt his face; there were tears. Edward closed his eyes in exhaust and lay down in the corner, shivering in his own arms.

It had been a thousand years, but this was the coldest night.

***

Darkness.

The dim candlelight had long run out. Edward twitched as darkness engulfed him. It was suffocating. He parted his lips to scream, but there was no sound.

Only the cold, bitter beating of his cursed heart. The heart which would never fail to function.

"Edward…" A tender, soft voice calling from behind him. Bella.

Edward smiled bitterly. It must be his hallucinations. He had millions in the past thousand years when the loneliness was too unbearable. Edward had no courage to turn his head.

Then a hand patted on his shoulder. Slowly but firmly, Bella hugged him. Edward started to look back at her, before realizing his long fangs were still bended in place. He gave a cry of dismay and avoided her eyes.

Bella raised his face with determination, not allowing him to hide.

"Edward, you need to listen." She whispered. "In my eyes, no matter what you are, you're always the most handsome, charming, attractive person I have, and will ever know." Bella's eyes were bright stars in the dark. Edward felt his tears bring softly licked away.

"I'm so sorry Edward, so sorry for everything that's happened." Bella placed Edward's head on her chest and cuddled him tighter. "I'm sorry for us too. For our love, our future, our past…everything I have forgotten."

Bella gently kissed his head.

"Edward, believe me. Please believe me, Edward." She kept repeating until Edward summoned enough strength and bravery to hug her back. Soon they were embracing in the dark. Edward held her strongly, with the might to force her into part of him. Then they would be one, they could never be apart.

"Bella…, Bella…" He mumbled her name over, rolling the beloved name at the tip of his tongue.

Bella traced her fingers along Edward's chin.

"Take me with you, Edward." There was a hard determination in her unwavering voice.

Edward stared at the woman he loved so dearly. He knew if he could just bite her, sink his teeth into her sweet flesh, his misery, loneliness and sufferings would stop. There was a blazing fire in Bella's eyes. Edward knew she had her mind set. She would not regret her decision.

But Edward sighed.

"No, Bella, I can't." He shook his head. "I saved you a thousand years back so you didn't have to become a vampire. I don't want you to live in pain and blame me forever. Look at me, Bella." Edward kissed her eyes. "I appear young with a remarkable life, a dazzling future. But my heart Bella, it had long lost the enthusiasm to beat. My soul is an old, tired and worn out spirit. I can never have a rest like you could when your life ends. You have your future, and your next life to anticipate. I face myself with animosity. You can choose to erase past memories and start afresh each life with new chapters. I, on the other hand, relive the same desolation countless times, a memento of what a monster I am. Bella, you can move on, you can forget."

Edward touched her cheek. It was soft like a baby's.

Bella grabbed Edward's hand and placed it on her forehead.

"Start afresh?" She sneered. "I never started afresh, Edward, I never had that chance you're insisting. I reincarnated four times, and in each life before my death, I could see the past and remember everything. In each of my lives, the moment before I die, I try all I can to grab hold onto your face. I never want to forget you, and I don't." She lay in Edward's chest.

"This is why I have the dreams. Dreams that haunt me the second I was born. You were in every single one of them. I can't see your face, but I could feel you. Edward, we can't start afresh. There's no new beginning, please. I'll keep having them, till I die, then all over again, forever and ever till eternity."

Edward hugged Bella tighter. He could imagine the tortures she went through each life. The dreams, by no means they let her off.

He started to speak, but Bella pressed her lips onto his. Then they crumpled onto the nearby couch. Her lips were warm and sweet, his was icy. Bella raised her neck and pushed it towards' Edward.

He could smell the sugary, inviting blood flowing under her porcelain skin. He could savor the honey taste. "Bite me…Edward, Bite me…" Bella chanted and pressed her neck harder against his fangs.

Edward tried to resist the temptation. But before he knew it his pointed fangs were piercing through her neck.

Bella felt a chill at the side of her neck. Instead of back away she hugged him tighter.

"Yes Edward, bite me…" She moaned.

"Bella…" Edward gave a snarled and knew he could take it no longer. He whispered in her ear and sank his fangs deeper. The honey taste was now rolling in his mouth.

***

Bella kept her eyes open, her joy flowing like a river. She looked up and saw the full moon amidst of the pouring rain and lightning. The clear, white moon hanged just like a thousand years ago.

_But this time it's different. This time we'll be together forever. _She thought. _No one can separate us, not even death. Like two rivers we have blended into one, and will always stay that way. Edward, I love you so._

Then Edward's razor sharp teeth sank deeper into her flesh, she could literally feel the tear of her thin blood vessel.

"Ah…" Bella gave a subtle groan. It was barely audile in the wind and rain. But Edward had vampire ears, and to him it sounded loud like thunder. It brought him back to sense from mania.

He watched Bella. There was blatant pain on her face, yet she bit on her lip to stop the gasp, trying not to make a sound till the ordeal was over. Edward's fangs vanished and in a split second, he had tapped Bella's tiny bump at the back of her head.

Unknown to people, the tiny bump at the back of their head controls the physical movements.

Bella felt tinges of numbness spreading throughout her body. She looked at Edward in disbelief. Edward held her in his arms, caressing her collarbone, where an inch above a wound was bleeding.

"I'm so sorry Bella." He twirled a strand of her hair. "I'm so very sorry."

"I wish I could bite you, it's the one thing I want the most in the world. We can return to our wheat field, build our own village, it'll be just like the past. We can do everything together. If only I could bite you, I'll be the happiest man. But I can't."

Bella couldn't talk. She couldn't even move eyes. She glared at him with rage and hatred.

_Why? Why?_ She shrieked in silence.

Edward touched her cheek again, feeling the wetness from its tears.

"You're not going to become an immortal, Bella, you're becoming a _vampire_. I can't let that happen to you. Bella, it takes too much endurance and resistance not to kill when you become one. Vampires are monsters that obsess after blood. Once you get a taste of human blood, there's no return. I've been doing a great job. I haven't hurt anyone for these thousand years. I stuck with animal blood, hard as it is. I can't watch you become what I am, Bella, and suffer to tolerate the deepest hunger. I can't allow you to hurt anyone." He kissed her cheek. "And I know you wouldn't, because you are the kindest girl I have ever seen. But I can't risk it. If I lose once, Bella, what heaven I create for us will be hell for the others…And you know I can't let that happen."

Edward's tone was now hard and determined. Bella tried to look away. Edward put her softly down and walked up to the counter. He poured a glass of wine; Bella could tell it was Await. Then he gave himself a little cut by the finger and dripped his blood into the glass. Drop by drop, the liquid soon turned blindingly red.

Edward fished out a pill from his pocket and dissolved it into the glass. He paused, pondered and dissolved a second pill.

Bella attempted to close her eyes. She couldn't. The only movement she had control of was the one thing she couldn't control: her running tears.

Edward raised the glass and shook it gently, blending the red until it was maroon at the bottom, lighter till it was transparent on top.

"Bella, I'd rather you forget our past. There'll be no more burdens. You can operate your company, find a husband that loves you, have your kids, and live in the warm sun." Edward motioned at the wine.

"I added an extra 'Forget' pill this time. The dreams can't taunt you again."

He walked gradually to Bella, lifting her up. Edward cupped her chin.

"Bella, once you drink this, you'll not remember me. But I'll be right here waiting in this bar, Bella; I'll always be waiting for you to come back next life…or forget me forever."

Edward's voice began to tear up.

"I'll tell you a secret, Bella," He murmured into her ear. "That night…I had a chance to kill myself before the monster bit me. But I chose not. I didn't want to forget you. I didn't want us to walk past each other like strangers in future lives, when we shared such powerful love." Edward clung onto Bella, his eyes tearing. "You questioned my promise of forever." He directed her hand at his heart. "As long as I live, Bella, my love never fades."

Bella's lashes were rapidly trembling.

Edward glanced at the window.

"It's almost dawn. Cheer up girl, you can try counting stars. That'll help you sleep," He cracked into a broken smile. "And when you wake up, tomorrow will be another day."

He kissed the corner of her lips.

"Let me hug you one last time, my love." And he was hugging her. It was the most heartbreaking hug Bella ever known. He was clutching onto her, yet caressing her like handling a fragile piece of rare jewel.

_Please God, please stop the time. I want this to stretch forever, please. _But her prayer was unanswered.

Edward slowly took a sip from 'Forget', and kissed her mouth. This time, it was a full strength kiss that Bella could not reject. He forced her lips open and pushed the fluid down her throat.

Bella had guessed right. It was the taste of fragrant lavenders. Her favorite flower. There was also the taste of bitter, salty tears.

Edward's tears and hers.

Bella tried desperately to keep her eyes open. She looked with all her might at Edward, carving him onto her soul, willing herself not to forget. She painted his features into her mind, certain it would never lose the bright colors…But Bella was never so tired, and she wanted to sleep.

Bella began counting stars.

For the first time, the technique worked brilliantly. Bella fell into a deep slumber. The pictures in her mind were blurred, then paler…and were gone.

***

Bella woke at dawn.

She looked around and was shocked to see an unfamiliar place. There was a counter, glasses unwashed, and couches…it was a bar that she had no memory of ever coming.

"Anyone here?" Bella asked and turned.

She saw, faintly, a man half hidden in the dim candlelight. His back was facing her. He was crouched, wiping the table. Bella stood where she was and raised her voice.

"Excuse me; do you know where this place is?"

There was only silence.

"Weirdo." Bella muttered and felt a sudden surge of headache. She gave a low moan and tasted the scent of lavender in her mouth.

"I must have been high." Bella mumbled and tottered her way out the Waiting Bar.

She never looked back.

***

Edward wiped, try as he might, hard at the table. His head was stooped low, so no one could see him.

He wiped again, in vain. The tears were sliding down his face on the table, leaving big water marks.

A drop, another drop, and yet another, there seemed no end…

***

If time couldn't erase our pain, then what could?

***

Note: There will be no continuation. I might be starting a new story, but no continuation cause I love tragedies, especially ones that main guys suffer in :)

The End


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